Posts

What is a Dad?

  Happy Father’s day all!  Father’s day is very important to me for 2 reasons.  One, my Dad is no longer with us and neither is my Grandpa.  Both were extremely important in my life and I am always looking for ways to honor them.  The second reason is the motivation for today’s post which is that Dad’s are not celebrated or appreciated appropriately compared to their female counterparts, and I want to address that.  In today’s thought journey, I will take you through what I believe the sacrifices and true responsibility of being a father is as well as some really great inputs from my friends, family and co-workers when I asked them directly about being a Dad or what they think being one will be like.   Parenting is tough.  That is the messaging anyway you slice it.  There are tales of sacrifice, sleep deprivation, being stronger than you ever realized you could be, and also softer with a sense of love that only comes with being responsib...

The American Dream or Nightmare?

  We are taught to work hard so we can play hard.  We are sold the idea that the college educated people sporting suits, living behind white picket fences with new Suburbans in the driveway are the showcase piece of success in America.  We believe that the more money we make the happier we will be, and there is a desire instilled in us all from an early age to chase this dream, this status, this destination and all its material possessions at almost any cost.  We trade our hobbies, our free time, or worse, our health, happiness, precious relationships and our financial freedom in exchange for these status symbols.  A silent statement of accomplishment.  In this thought journey, I want to discuss a complex idea that is broken down into a simple question.  Which is the bigger flex?  The house, car and the look, or a modest life which opens the door to early retirement and the possession of ‘fuck you money’?  Is it the American dream or the Amer...

A Positive Love

There is beauty in you far greater than the sea A fire that burns for you far redder than the brilliant maple tree You have kindness that suffocates my greatest demons and passion that ignites my weakest points Joy that illumates my soul as we set sail for a better place A place where no one has gone before, so rare and remote I can only find as I get lost stating into your face Let me in, let me far beyond the front door Let me into all the places where your heart has less light Let me show you I can lighten the load so we can travel through the night I know I said I wasn't sure but forever more I I'll be the one by your side without reasons without pride But now I'm sure of my worth I want to love you at your worst Possibility more vast than the sky For once I know that I only want you as mine Your voice sounds like a lullaby  Your touch that soothes and takes me high  higher than the tree tops  But what about the thunderstorm that's bound to darken some days Can you ...

The Giving Season

  It’s the most wonderful time of the year.  There is magic, kindness, a lightness in the air, that signature Christmas feeling.  A feeling that we can so easily capture as kids but the older I get, the more I struggle to find the magic in the season.  Holding onto that feeling is a challenge.  One day you have it and the next day it is gone.  My suspicion is that most of us have trouble finding the magic in the season or having an interest in the season at all.  In this thought journey, I want to explore the reasons why I think the collective group of us can’t enjoy the most wonderful time of the year as we should.  Let’s explore. There are many classic Christmas tales that we look forward to every year.  The two I will focus on for the purpose of this discussion are the Scrooge, and the Grinch.  The Scrooge shows us that focusing on work, material and monetary gains and ultimately greed, do nothing but steal your joy, allow loneliness ...

A Lovely Tradition

  We’re in the home stretch of the year. The temperatures are colder, the days are shorter and our to-do lists are likely longer than normal.  The season is filled with warmth, joy, laughter, and a sense of kindness that can only belong to this time of year.  From Halloween to New Years Day we say yes to parties, dinners, drinks with friends, travel plans and maybe even obligations that we simply commit to out of obligation, not desire.  In this thought journey I want us to challenge the concept of traditions not only for holiday celebrations but in every aspect of our lives.  I’m talking about everything from your Christmas day plans to wedding plans to how you structure your family life and gender roles.  After all, this is your life so why not do the things that bring you happiness and contentment and not worry so much about what the family wants you to do or the questions your friends will ask.  Let's explore! As some of you who read this blog may ...

All I'd Have

  I have no more time for your labyrinth All the lies I can't keep straight Used to dream about life in your palace But all this running I can't keep pace Had a dream I came back, you made effort But I know that's the last thing I would choose. I don't want a life alone with you Baby, I don't play games that set me up to loose You're all I would have Alone and sad and searching for myself You're all I would have Don't want a life spent dusty on your shelf I broke free but it feels underwhelming Some days spent scared and confused So many times I screamed why couldn't you hear me You were supposed to help me but I just feel used You're all I would have Alone and sad and searching for myself You're all I would have Don't want a life spent dusty on your shelf I wanted you You wanted me I lied because you lied to me Most days you're all that I could see Despite the fire in the trees I ran to you You ran from me Wanting something that c...

Cleansing Change

  I spend a lot of time walking.  I walk my dogs, I walk during my lunch hour.  You can even find me late at night on a walk.  It’s a tool I use for clear thinking.  My recent walks have made me aware of the changing seasons.  As September gives way to October and the green trees turn fire and yellow, I find myself watching colored leaves floating peacefully to the ground.  I’m reminded that change is upon me in more ways than one, and that change is a good thing. So often change is viewed as something that is undesired, scary or bad.  We are told that change is  different or unexpected, and possibly even to be feared.  The standard seems to be that change is forced and brings unfavorable circumstances to our lives.  Phrases like, “Change is inevitable”, or, “Nothing is so painful to the human mind as a great and sudden change”, keep the narrative alive that change is a masked man, a bad guy waiting in the shadows to pounce and forc...